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When men and women meet each other and they like each other, life would be easier if there would be no shielded hearts. If men would be open and honest. Hey I like you, want to get to know you better. Let’s exchange numbers and why not go out on a date and see where this goes. There are men that do this. In reality however, because of fear of rejection and total humiliation and obviously the end of the world that then follows, a lot of men use a different approach. They are not direct. Some are so under the radar and covert even a professional spy wouldn’t know what to make of their actions and reactions.

For example, they may use an excuse to talk to you, they may try to be your friend first, they may use an excuse to ask for your phone number and not say it’s because they want to go on a date with you. Which will obviously also not become clear when they start texting you about stuff that has nothing to do with going on a romantic date. However, if you know where to look, they will be showing you a ton of signs that they are falling head over heels for you. We’ll start with when you first meet each other, then the conversations you will have and so on. We’ll also look at the things YOU can do to speed up the process. So let’s talk about it.

My name is Geert, I’m an author, I also use the pen name Brian Nox and first, in my opinion relationships are easier when the man likes you. And that’s super obvious but what I mean is that when a man has really fallen for you, you get his best behavior, he will put in efforts, he will treat you well and so on, so in my opinion the goal is to only date someone who REALLY likes you, who doesn’t have to be convinced in any way or form. Here’s how to spot that a man really likes you even if he’s trying to not show it too much for whatever reason.

And there are many reasons. For example, maybe you work together, maybe he thinks you are out of his league, maybe his friend was interested in you first and he’s trying to be respectful towards his friend OR, obviously he’s probably afraid of rejection and the idea of you turning him down is at the moment his worst nightmare because then he has to let go of the dream of ever being with you. Yes, some men are deep and emotional thinkers at times.

Here’s a great sign. Men are visual creatures. If they like you they cannot stop looking at you. If you’re at a get together or a networking event and you walk by a guy that likes you, he will track you. You cannot walk past him without him knowing. If you’re in his vicinity, he will look at you and he cannot help it. If you then look at him, a player may immediately smile at you, a lot of other men won’t. They feel caught and they look away. And this can happen multiple times during that event. Because he cannot help it. You already have an effect on him.

Then he’s going to look for an excuse to talk to you. For example, maybe at some point you’re standing next to someone he already knows and if and when you do, he will join your group faster than a squirrel that’s chasing after a nut. Now during a conversation, especially in person but also using text messages, he’s going to start proving himself to you. The more he likes you or believes you are out of his league, the more proving he will do. One of the biggest signs that a man likes you before you have a relationship, is when he starts talking about himself.

And I know, if it’s about himself why would he be interested in you? Well, there are a couple of reasons why men show off. If they do it towards men, then they are often trying to show some dominance or gain respect: look at what I have achieved, look at my job, my car, my muscles, now you will respect me right? No? Well have I told you about my… When they do it towards a woman, they not just want her respect, but her attention and love as well.

And he won’t always be showing off. He will try to paint a picture of who he is and what he is about. He’s selling himself to you. Especially if you hadn’t had a first date yet. He knows that dating apps are full of attractive muscular t-shirtless vikings you can pick from or men leaning on a Lamborghini…rental car, sometimes. So he may think he has to make a difference showing his personality and who HE is as a person using words and stories.

And don’t underestimate this. Every man that doesn’t look like an attractive viking or isn’t famous, if he’s interested in you he will not be flexing the huge muscles he doesn’t have, he will be using words and stories to show you why you should be interested in him. There’s a small group of attractive men that gets attention from a lot of women because of what they look like and they just have to walk into the room or upload some shirtless pictures to a dating app. And then there is the huge group of men that believe they need to prove why they are worth your attention and they will do that by telling you stories about themselves.

Ah so you studied marketing? So did I and I used to make the TV-commercials for a big bank. Important TV-commercials. Ah, you have a dog, a cocker spaniel? Yeah my sister has one too, I’m good with dogs. But I hate ca…you have a cat? I love cats. Totally not allergic to them or anything. You play piano? What a coincidence. I love listening to piano music, I used to go to piano concerts when I was little. I’m still little. Wish I was taller, like a viking but whatever. Have I told you about what I do for a living?

And this, just like the looking part earlier, they cannot help! When men are talking to a woman they find attractive, they start making it about them. You say something and his mind is looking for how that relates to him and how it can make him look important. So here’s a first way to help him fall even harder for you. Make him feel important. Not by lying or acting, only if you are impressed by something he’s explaining of course. But let him know you are impressed. You can also ask him questions of course. You showing interest in him really helps as well.

Because, again, when he’s very attracted to you, he will often be trying to hide it. Most men over say 25 know that even though they are falling hard for a woman, it’s a bad idea to put her on a pedestal and worship her after a 5-minute conversation. Or even a first date. Most, not all of them. I recently had a 24-year-old woman complain about men she went on a date with that were all over her after just one date. She then lost interest because it was too much too soon. A lot of men have learned that lesson, but sometimes the pendulum then swings in the opposite direction and these men start hiding how much they like you, because they like you so much and don’t want you to lose interest.

SO. If you want to speed up him unhiding his feelings for you, give him small signs that you’re interested in him. Small. When he’s explaining something, ask some questions about it. As a man, some of the ways we know someone might be interested in us is when that woman asks us personal questions. When she wants to know more about us and is then impressed by some of it. It makes us feel good. As I always say: when a man likes you, he wants to be your hero. Also, if you’re standing in a group, give him a bit more attention than you give to the other men. That way he will also know that whatever he’s trying to do to impress you, is working. And yes, if he likes you he is paying attention to how much attention you give to other men.

Another great sign that a man really likes you and that he’s possibly falling hard for you is, if on top of the other signs, he’s asking you questions AND he’s impressed by what you are explaining. So in the conversation he’s going to make it clear that he thinks you are special, he’s not meeting someone like you every day. He may also try to prove that there is a match. By looking for how the both of you are alike or compatible. And when he finds a compatibility, he’s going to point it out. What you like babies and kids, good news I’m still very immature, I have the emotional capacities of a 2-year old! Just kidding.

Here’s another great sign. Depending on his personality type he might also try to help you. If you tell a guy that’s not interested in you that you face a challenge or that you’re not good at something he is good at or could help you with, he will probably ignore that. If and when he likes you, he’s looking for excuses to spend more time with you. He wants to make sure he can see you again AND because you’re becoming important to him, he wants to make you happy. SO, he’ll say ah I can help you with that, call me if that ever happens again. What’s your number? See, under the radar tactics. Now he has your number.

Obviously the more a man likes you, the more time he wants to spend with you and he will find ways to achieve that. And if he’s afraid to show his romantic interest in you for the reasons I already gave earlier, he will search for other ways to meet up with you. And that is also another sign. Time is obviously very valuable. A man can spend his time working on his career, on his viking muscles, playing call of duty or some other game, watching sports or tv or movies and all these things will give him emotions and dopamine and thus great feelings. Or, he can spend his time with the woman he’s interested in. Because SHE is giving him great feelings.

It’s very simple. And by the way what I’m about to say is only for the first stages of the relationship, this will not last forever and that’s normal. But in the beginning and especially before the relationship has started, he will drop almost everything to spend time with you. Especially before the first kiss when he’s still unsure of your feelings for him. And then, when he is spending time with you, he will not be looking at the time. There are few other places he would rather be than there with you.

And he will let you know that! “I like spending time with you”, “I love talking to you”, “I hope I will see you again”. Another great sign is that, when talking to you, he’s going to lean in. He wants to be as close to you as possible without making it awkward. He also going to focus on you. Not a lot of things will distract him. He’s not looking around, he’s looking into your eyes, or at your lips and mouth (which either means there’s a piece of food between your teeth or he’s thinking about kissing you).

And then, he’s going to touch you, but again under the radar. Small touches, on the upper arm for example, touches you won’t see him making with men or other women. If he does, then he’s just very touchy but men usually are not. And finally, he may ask you what your type is. When a man asks you what your type is, he’s obviously hoping for you to say “you”, and not, “well that guy over there, the one that looks like an attractive viking”.

I hope you appreciated this video.

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